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Even More of More of More Funny One Liner's

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Even More of More of More Funny One Liner's

Post by Tanzanite/Cindy on Tue Jun 09, 2009 7:01 am

There's too much blood in my caffeine system.

Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.

Time is the best teacher; unfortunately it kills all of its students.

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes
.
Wanted: Meaningful overnight relationship.

Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear.

We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?

We were born naked, wet and hungry. Then things got worse.

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

What is a free gift? Aren't all gifts free?

What's the speed of dark?

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way
.
When there's a will, I want to be in it.

When you don't know what you are doing, do it neatly.

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?

Who stopped payment on my reality check?

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

You are depriving some poor village of its idiot.

You can do more with a kind word and a gun than with just a kind word.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.

You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you!

Your gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot.

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